Excuse this post in all of its uncomprehensible (or is it incomprehensible) glory.

I’ve been away from the site for, like, ever.  Why?  Ugh, I’m fat.  I’m fat and I haven’t been doing anything to be un-fat.  No, it’s not even being fat that I have a problem with.  I have a problem with being out of breath from trudging up three flights of stairs to my apartment.  Or sweating beneath my skirt in an air conditioned room.  And the fact that my belly can hold my napkin in place on my lap.

And I’m going to see The Mom.  I know the look she’ll have when I disembark and there will be a smile there because we love each other and it’s been too long since we’ve seen each other.  And regardless of my step-sister being there or the fact that the reason for my visit to Vegas is to see my step-brother’s new baby, the world won’t really exist outside of me and her cause for a while it was me and her against the world. But at some point we’ll have a talk.  Not a talk about the weather or work or shopping.  No, a talk about me being… fat.  And that I need to get healthy.  And I’m not getting any younger and this gets harder as you age and and and…. yeah.  I know.  Believe me.  I know.

Maybe if I wear makeup she won’t notice the extra pounds.  It could happen, right?

So when I get back to the land of evil day job and doting hubby, i’ll hop back on the wagon of Weight Watchers (the oooold 123 Success plan) and pray that the 60 lbs I lost long ago decides to disappear again.  Foreber.

Celia

I’m happy to say most of the Thanksgiving leftovers went down two masculine gullets this weekend with only two lapses in self-discipline from me. Since one of those lapses resulted in a case of hives, I won’t be tempted again!

While I’ve not confirmed this with a doctor, it seems I’ve developed an allergy to pecans. (grumble)

However, all is not lost. I was reminded of a website I used with great success two years ago called http://www.SavingDinner.com This site not only provides you with a weekly set of recipes, you can customize the menus to suit your needs –even kosher and gluten-free! Needless to say, I chose the low-carb version. Best of all, it comes with a shopping list! I just print out my choices and march off to the grocery store.

I’m looking forward to Chicken Peanut Mole, Southwestern Meatloaf, and Crock Pot Asian Chicken Salad, among others. Tomorrow is Cajun Stir Fry! 

The download is a fairly substantial PDF file, and you must choose what set you need. For instance, my download came with the regular meal plan for two or four, and the low-carb plan for two or four. Some of the recipes even have the Weight Watchers points! How cool is that?

I paid for a year, but I know and love the service. Those who don’t know it may wish to give the free week a try first. It pays for itself very quickly because you only buy what you need from the list, not random impulse purchases. Even a few low-carb lunch choices and a recipe are included.

Lena Austin

http://www.LenaAustin.com

Hello everyone, I am so honored to have been invited here to this group. I was just talking to Lena about all my weight loss woes and all of a sudden I had this nice invitation in my box.

A little about me. I have several nicknames on the internet, my name is Karri though. Well, as close as it can be after using it since the 10th grade. *chuckles* I actually do write as well, mostly fan fiction, but nothing published yet. My characters for a future published work are refusing to name themselves. *grumbles*

I run a book review site called the Howling Scribe. I recently started a newsletter for it , and was interviewing Lena for it when I listened to an interview by her with Stella and the conversation went from there.

I currently weigh 340 lbs. At the beginning of the year, I weighed 365. So I have gradually lost 25lbs this year so far. I guess you could say that I did it gradually, and healthier, but I have no idea where the weight went. lol

I am trying to get a walking group together here, but my co-workers who started one, have all disappeared on me. It doesn’t help that all of the people that were in the group are married or have kids and I don’t. *grumbles*  I am determined, Florida weather permitting, to start walking a mile every day I work. I work 2 on, 2 off, with a 3 day work or off. Which basically means walking 2 to 5 times a week depending on the week.

I have tiny little ankles, and they aren’t in the best of health due to a car accident years ago, but I have been told by my doctor that the gym isn’t good for my back. I keep wondering if I need a second opinion.

I really want to get weight loss surgery, but my insurance doesn’t pay for it. So I am stuck all alone, with no help, so any encouragement is good I think.

Diet Blog: http://3fatchicks.com/diet-blogs/wolfskies/

Just how much humiliation am I supposed to take? Today was a group session at the surgeon’s. You know what I learned? What an ass one of the surgeons is. That’s it.

After the weigh in, in which I gained a whole half-pound, we had the usual and repetitive lecture on how important it is we shrink our livers. I was feeling pretty good about my weight, actually. I’d had a full bladder and heavy winter clothing on, but the scale said only half a pound. I could live with that. I knew also I’d had a few too many macadamia nuts over the past few days and vowed to cut them out.

Finally, the surgeon appeared. He was as handsome as rumor had claimed. I had a hard time understanding his accent, since he was from South Africa. The Afrikaners I’ve known can seem to mumble a bit to our American ears. I’d had an Afrikaner teacher back in real estate school and I’d adored him, so I was prepared to like the surgeon, Dr. Cywes. How wrong I was.

After introducing himself and matching faces to files, he immediately turned to me and asked me if I felt my life was busy. I warily answered, “Yes.”

Then, without warning, he launched into what I can only call an attack, using me as the proverbial bad example of a patient who wasn’t on board with the program, addicted to carbs, and out of control.

I was shocked and humiliated. I protested that I’d only gained half a pound.

He thrust his finger at another member of the group. “She lost ten pounds.” He then went on with his lecture, now pointing out how I was defending myself and in total denial of my actions.

For the next hour, I swallowed tears and humiliation while he pontificated as if he knew me, accusing me of eating all sorts of carbs, ignoring the diet, and –the crowning touch—comparing me to a drug addict in need of a twelve-step program.

I was never so grateful when he finally ended his speech and swept out of the room like he could barely stand to be around us a moment longer. Baby, the feeling was mutual.

Worse, I found out one of the other women in the room had gained a pound and a half. I can only surmise that my file was on top and therefore most convenient.

All I can say right now is that I will make a special request that the other doctor is my surgeon.

I barely responded when another one of his staff came in and told me my paperwork was complete and the packet would be on its way to Tricare tomorrow. She informed the whole group that surgical dates are now being filled for January, so we can plan for late January or perhaps early February.

Lovely. Somehow, we must all remain on the liver reduction, low-carb diet through the entire holiday season. Are they insane? Why don’t I just move to a nice deserted island until January 1?

I’m doing the happy dance! After weeks of no weight loss results because my willpower was weaker than a kitten, I finally had a temper tantrum. I was tired of being sabotaged by my darlings, who do not have to watch their carbs. While Randy is thin as a rake and Dante not so thin, both have the right to eat as they please.

Before my tantrum, they’d eat their carb-loaded goodies right in front of me, leave the food out where I had to look at it, desire it, and eventually snitch some of it. Worse, they’d actually encourage me to cheat by offering to share or whining when I made healthy meals.

I absolutely must shrink my liver. If  I don’t shrink the liver, the surgery must be cancelled. Therefore, it’s imperative that my weak willpower must be shored up with something.

Finally, I had a breakthrough and a tantrum. After I “explained” to Randy how he and Dante were unconsciously sabotaging my diet, he worked with me to create “contraband storage.” The gray pantry and the big black refrigerator out in the Florida Room now have sturdy locks on them, and that’s where all the contraband goes.

What I can have now stays conveniently in the pantry and fridge here in the house, where I can make the easier choice to eat healthy while not denying the boys their right to the snacks they want.

It seems to be working! For the past two days, when I got hungry I went to the pantry and saw only what I was allowed to have. My choices were simplified with no temptations to make me stray.

Then yesterday I stepped on the scale at my doctor’s office. I’ve lost FIVE pounds! Okay, so it’s not the 8-10 pounds a month I could lose. I’m happy. Any weight loss counts as liver shrinkage.

Next week is the second of the three doctor visits allowed by my insurance. After I “see” (hah!) him in a group session, the next time must be my pre-op. Am I finished jumping through hoops? No. I’m not that stupid.